Show cover of Beauty in Battle Podcast

Beauty in Battle Podcast

Beauty in Battle is a high-energy conversation for married couples to help you energize your relationship, give you purpose, and draw you close to your spouse by turning the tension that divides you into energy that fuels you. In this podcast, Jason and Tori Benham share the stories of their relationship and the practical ways they turned conflict and quarrels into passion and purpose by leaning into their struggles rather than trying to avoid them. As a result, they discovered that fighting together drew them together. Their message is clear - you don’t need to stop fighting; you need to start fighting … the right way. When you and your spouse choose to no longer fight against each other in a personal battle but alongside one another in a spiritual war, the results are amazing as you begin to recognize your God-given purpose together. Laced with practical insights and easy-to-follow steps, our discussions will help you discover:* The number one relationship killer and how to stay away from it. * How to combat negative thinking toward your spouse. * The one key that will magnetize you to your spouse and your spouse to you.* How to win your love back when “you’ve lost that lovin’ feeling.”* Why there was a wedding crasher at the first marriage in history and how he showed up at your wedding too. We all fight. The question is, will you discover the beauty in battle? We're here to help you do just that!


Three Keys to Intimacy
We were created for oneness with our spouse. The question is, how do we practically do it? Today's episode will give you three keys to drawing close and staying close to your spouse so you can experience a marriage that will last. Enjoy.
31:32 3/26/24
Self Awareness in Marriage
The healthiest marriages are emotionally intelligent marriages. And the key to emotional intelligence is self-awareness. Join us as we discuss the three levels of self-awareness and how you can walk through each level to strengthen your marriage. Enjoy! 
35:44 3/19/24
Harnessing Emotions to Strengthen Your Marriage
One of our greatest needs is emotional connection. Harnessed properly, emotions can draw you together in a deep and powerful way. Today's episode is all about helping you do just that. Join us as we share three keys to emotional connection built upon a Biblical and scientific framework. Enjoy!
38:44 3/13/24
Two Powerful Questions
If you want to magnetize your spouse to you, this episode is a "must-listen." We're going to share two powerful questions that will put you in a frame of mind to draw your spouse close and connect you emotionally. Enjoy!
24:50 3/6/24
Six Healthy Marriage Habits
Join us as we discuss six key marriage habits we've discovered that have drawn us closer and helped us turn conflict into connection. Based on proven research, these six keys can revolutionize your marriage!
37:23 2/28/24
Four Pillars of a Strong Marriage
Join us as we dive into a little brain science that shows the power of our right-brain and how it is wired to run on four key things. These four keys are pillars that will support and strengthen your marriage when you apply them to your relationship.  Enjoy!
27:00 2/21/24
Dealing With Insecurity In Marriage
Intimacy is to be fully known and fully accepted. God made us for intimacy - both with Himself and with others. In marriage, intimacy is the lifeblood of your relationship. But it's hard. Why? Because intimacy reveals insecurity. In today's episode, we dive into the topic of insecurity and give three keys on how to overcome it. You'll enjoy this Valentine's Day edition as we tackle a difficult issue that we all face. Enjoy.  And ...HAPPY VALENTINES DAY!
33:45 2/14/24
A 3-Part Grid For Conflict Resolution
Today's episode is all about how to properly manage conflict and a 3-part grid we've learned that has helped us overcome conflict in our own marriage. It's built upon the foundation that conflict is meant for connection - it’s God’s way of turning you from “me” into “we.” This mindset will help you w/any conflict. Join us as we share this unique grid that can help you work through any conflict!
29:20 2/6/24
The Powerful Role of the HELPER
This episode is sure to blow your hair back, especially if you're a wife! We dive deep into the meaning of the phrase "helper suitable" and the powerful implications it has on the role of a woman in marriage. Taken from the context of creation and attaching a new spin on relationship dynamics, this conversation will leave you feeling empowered and excited about your marriage. Join us in this fun and interesting deep-dive into the world of female identity. This podcast is a "must listen" for wives to understand their true identities and husbands to grasp the powerful role your wife has in your own identity. Enjoy!
20:38 1/30/24
Two Words To Grow Your Marriage
Each year we ask God to give us a word for the following year. This year God gave us two words (well, technically four, but who's counting?). Today, we're gonna share those words with you and how you can use them to help build and grow your relationship. Enjoy
35:46 1/23/24
How To Stay Attached To Each Other
Today we're going to dive into Attachment Theory and how we can apply it to our marriage. Recent studies have shown how your primary attachments early in life dictate the strength of your attachments later in life, but how we can each grow to deeper levels of connection by simply being aware of our attachment style. Attachment is defined as "a deep and enduring emotional bond between two people in which each seeks closeness and feels more secure when in the presence of the other.”Attachment Theory is a set of principles regarding how people attach with others in relationships. Coined by psychologist John Bowlby in 1969, he states that when we form our primary attachment, we also make a mental representation of what a relationship is, which we then use for all other relationships in the future i.e., friendships, working, and romantic relationships.We look forward to jumping in and discovering what we can learn about attachment and how it can help us connect deeper with our spouse. 
35:59 1/16/24
Sweat Together, Stay Together
You cannot be the spouse or parent God made you to be if you are not physically well. Today's episode focuses on the importance of exercise and nutrition in your marriage and how suffering together draws you together when you choose to focus on your physical fitness as a couple. Plus, we're going to share nine keys to a healthy lifestyle from an expert coach. Enjoy!  P.S. If you haven't gotten your copy of our latest book, Marriage A To Z, grab one HERE!
35:22 1/10/24
The Power of Kindness in Marriage
We often take for granted the importance of being kind to our spouse. But recent research has shown the power that simple kindness has on your physical, mental, emotional, and relational health. In this episode, we're going to talk about three aspects of kindness, the brain science behind it, and the four building blocks to becoming a kinder person. Enjoy!
27:24 1/5/24
Discovering Your Childhood Message
Your childhood was the university of your relationships. How you thought and what you believed as a child plays into the way you respond as an adult. In today's episode, Tori will dissect the nine types of childhood messages and dissect the fears and desires they are built upon. Your inner child is still speaking. Shining a light on this subconscious voice will make sure it does not sabotage your marriage!Enjoy. If you haven't gotten your copy of our newest and best-selling book Marriage A To Z, grab your copy HERE. 
41:28 12/27/23
Three Signs You Have A Strong Bond
Join us in this fun episode where we dive into three research-backed signs that reveal you have a strong marriage. These three relational traits ensure that your friendship is deep and your bond is strong. You'll like this one. And if you haven't purchased a copy of our newest book, Marriage A To Z, you can pick up a copy HERE. It's a 30-Day devotional designed to strengthen your connection with your spouse. 
26:36 12/20/23
Protecting Your Marriage With Priorities & Boundaries
Your marriage is the most valuable asset you have, and you need to protect it like you would a priceless treasure. In today's episode, we're going to dive into priorities and how to wrap boundaries around them, as well as three key boundaries that will keep your marriage healthy and thriving. Enjoy.  Oh, and if you haven't grabbed a copy of our newly released book, Marriage A to Z, grab your copy HERE. 
33:18 12/12/23
Gaining a Fully Formed Marriage
A fully formed marriage is the result of two fully formed brains! If you want to experience health and wholeness in your life, marriage, and family, you must tap into the power of two-brained thinking. Based on a powerful book on the subject, we dive into the difference between the left-brain and the right-brain and the two key components that lead to health in every aspect of our lives and relationship. This episode is a must-listen as we learn how to experience joy in everyday life. Enjoy.  And if you haven't gotten our most recent book yet, Marriage A to Z, you can grab your copy HERE. 
30:35 12/7/23
How To Get Your Needs Met
Everybody has needs that must be met. How you go about getting them met is what this episode is all about. Join us as Tori dives deep into three key "stances" we all take to get our needs met and how we typically lean to one more than the others. Building on the foundation of emotional intelligence, these three key stances will help you understand yourself and your spouse in a much deeper way. Enjoy. 
29:45 11/28/23
The Power of Thank You
The primary factor in emotional and relational health is GRATITUDE.  Why? Because gratitude challenges negative thought patterns.  Negative thinking destroys your brain and your bond to your spouse.  In this special Thanksgiving episode, we're going to talk about how gratitude is the social emotion of the brain and how it makes you feel attached to the person you’re thankful for. We're also going to dive into the key for staying connected to your spouse using the habit of gratitude. Before we dive in, here are a few definitions to establish a foundation:Gratitude is the inward feeling of kindness received.  Thankfulness is the desire to express that feeling.   Thanksgiving is following through on that desire.   Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
19:29 11/20/23
Love & Respect
In marriage, each spouse has a core need. Ephesians 5 tells us that women need love and men need respect. Put in plain terms, women need to be prioritized and men need to be admired. If a husband shows his wife she's his #1 priority, she will feel loved. If a wife admires her husband, he will feel loved. Today's episode dives into one of our favorite books on marriage - Love & Respect by Dr. Emmerson Eggerichs. We will discuss these two core needs in marriage and the three cycles couples can find themselves in as they meet or "don't meet" these needs. Enjoy. 
32:30 11/14/23
How To Win Your Spouse
What do you do when you are giving your 100% best to strengthen your marriage but your spouse isn't on the same page? That's the question we're going to answer on today's episode. Taken from Tori's own journey through this same issue, we will share three keys to winning your spouse even when your spouse doesn't think there's an issue. Enjoy!
32:55 11/8/23
Winning The War In Your Mind
Your marriage will move in the direction of your strongest thoughts. Recognizing that your thinking will naturally gravitate toward the negative is the backdrop to today's episode as we show you how to keep your thinking on the positive side so that you can experience relational strength. Using Craig Groeshel's best-selling book "Winning The War In Your Mind" we'll dive into how winning the battle in your mind is the secret to winning the heart of your spouse. And, if you want to dive deeper, jump over to the Beauty In Battle Bootcamp and take our course that will help you change your thinking to transform your relationship. 
28:38 11/1/23
The Four Habits Of A Joy-Filled Marriage
Today's episode is based on a great book by the same title "The Four Habits Of A Joy-Filled Marriage" and how you can experience joy in your marriage by incorporating four simple habits into your daily life.  Built on the foundation that love is all about attachment, the authors show us that the more joy you build into your marriage the more you’ll feel in love.It's loaded with brain science and all the latest research on what makes couples tick. So join us as we discuss these powerful habits and ways we can use them in our relationships. Enjoy!
36:06 10/25/23
Getting To The Heart Of Your Spouse
Today's episode is taken from 1 Samuel 25 where a woman named Abigail shows us five keys to calling out the best in our spouse. She did it with her soon-to-be-husband, King David, and it literally magnetized him to her. You won't want to miss this one. Enjoy!
34:58 10/18/23
Marriage, Family, and Business w/David & Lori Benham
Today's episode is a fun one - we're joined by Jason's twin brother, David, and his wife Lori to talk about all things marriage and family. They've been married for 25 years, have five kids together, and own multiple businesses. We dive deep into the best advice they have for married couples and the parenting best-practices they've used to raise five children who all love Jesus. A few highlights: Learn their #1 marriage habit that keeps their relationship strong. Discover the "cone method" for parenting that ensures the greatest outcome for kids. How to balance work/life issues. The key to unlocking intimacy. How to handle conflict "shoulder-to-shoulder" to ensure deeper connection. and a lot more...Enjoy! 
50:51 10/10/23
Getting Your Edge Back In Marriage
Often times pain from the past robs you of power in your present and it sabotages your ability to connect deeply with your spouse. We heard it said, "If you never heal from what hurt you, then you’ll bleed on those who did not cut you.” Anytime you put two human beings together, at some point, sparks are going to fly. But what we’ve found is that the sparks that fly are often a fruit of the issue, not the root. They are simply symptoms of the real problem. The deeper issue is often linked to pain from the past. And it’s not until conflict arises that what’s at the bottom of our hearts begins to bubble up to the top. Fortunately, we have an example in Scripture of how to locate and heal past issues that can sabotage our present relationship.  Tune in as we dive into 2 Kings 6 to discover how we can get our edge back in marriage!
26:36 10/3/23
How To Stop Conflict Before It Starts
Research shows that arguments over small, nagging things happen as often as 312 times a year for the average married couple. The little stuff, if not managed properly, can ultimately damage your relationship. A small conflict can blow up into a big one if you don’t pay attention to these little things. In this episode, we share the two keys you need to stop conflict before it starts, as well as a research-backed exercise that will help you alleviate the damage of all the little things that can cause perpetual conflict. Enjoy! 
23:56 9/26/23
Marriage & Parenting Advice From Our Mentors
Today's episode is a special one because we get to interview our own mentors, Scott & Beth Volk. For the last 20+ years, we have watched these two pour themselves into their ministry while falling deeper in love with each other and raising mature, Jesus-loving kids.  And anytime we've needed advice, they're always a phone call away. Here's a sneak peek at some of the topics we cover: How hospitality and loving others will draw you close in marriageThe importance of being positive in the midst of conflict Why using “I” statements is the best way to communicate your needs How to elevate relationships over rules in parentingHow a spirit of simple niceness disarms your spouse The power of desire - if you “want” good kids you can have them How listening unlocks your children and draws them close to you The power of an apology when you’ve messed up Tune in and listen to these two all-stars share some of the best marriage and parenting advice you'll hear. Enjoy. 
55:08 9/20/23
The Four Horsemen of Marriage
Dr. John Gottman, the foremost researcher in all things marriage, and he's discovered four characteristics evident in all marriages that fail. He calls them the "Four Horsemen" of the Apocolypse, and if these four qualities are not dealt with quickly and properly the end of the relationship is inevitable. Fortunately, there's an antidote - four of them, to be precise. And in this episode, we're going to discuss all four. You won't want to miss this timely and valuable conversation on how to counteract the Four Horseman that can ruin your relationship. Enjoy.  p.s. If you haven't taken our free 5-Day Challenge you can join us HERE. 
28:48 9/12/23
Creating Relationship Systems
What do you want to accomplish in your life and marriage? Whatever it is, it will be impossible apart from systems. A system is a series of steps to help you achieve a desired result. If it works in business, it can work in your relationship! That's what today's episode is all about - helping you create systems in your marriage that will help you achieve what you desire. We start w/two powerful questions: WHAT DO YOU WANT? WHAT PROBLEMS ARE YOU HAVING? Once you answer these questions, it's time to wrap systems around your marriage so you can achieve what God has designed for you. Enjoy!
26:34 9/5/23

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