Help Me Be Me

This is for anyone who is holding onto a regret or pain that affects their identity in the present: something that you do not want to take into the new year. When something is bugging us about the past, we are really just pausing a part of the present and living through a warped memory. Sometimes that is because we feel that this will somehow give us what we deserve, like an unconscious act of penance. And sometimes it’s because we are twitching around this thing– almost like a muscle spasm. When we just can’t seem to face a regret in an objective and open way, we cannot process and release it.   So this is my invitation to release the spasm! Pop that zit! Let’s break open that thing whatever it is and work it out so that we can release it. A lot of the time these things will inform the next steps and that will be a gift. Don’t fear it, welcome it, it actually sets us free. I say that because SOOO many of the things that scare us from the past are actually really old fears that are not current or do not belong to the present. Like they are the fears of a 9-year-old self. Or the fears of a very sad child. Which takes me to an important caveat: approach this episode safely. I don’t want to make you triggered, overwhelmed or unstable. The holidays are already a big and heavy season because of that recurring marker that is this time of year. For you I want to remind you of therapy– a great resource to process sadness and grief caused by the echo of unprocessed loss. Often our bodies are in a static state of “but I don’t want this to be true.” And this is just an echo of that- like a splinter that now has formed scar tissue over it. For all of you I say walk toward the conflict within and let it be seen as a gift of insight and growth. It will be if you choose to see it as an opportunity. For more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo This episode is brought to you by EveryPlate! Get started with EveryPlate for just $1.49 per meal PLUS $1 steaks for life by going to EveryPlate.com/podcast and entering code 49helpmebeme. Subscription must be active to qualify and redeem $1 steak.  And Hydrow. Join the growing, rowing community at Hydrow. Head over to Hydrow.com and use code HELPMEBEME to save up to five hundred dollars off your Hydrow! And, if you want to donate to a very worthy cause, head to TheTeenProject.com – help rescue victims of sex-trafficking! And if you want to get started with some therapy, visit BetterHelp.com/HelpMeBeMe xo!     Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who is looking to be inspired and get closer to their unconscious goals as an artist and creator. I am trying to move closer to my artist self which has been a beautiful process of reuniting with the child that lives inside. One aspect of that process involves really letting go of what other people think is right and asking instead, “what do I have to say?” Removing the measures that pressure your ego to strive in ways that feel in opposition to who you are. I have some practices in this episode for you that are hopefully going to tune your being toward the best form of your creative projects that are ready to be expressed. I highly recommend you practice a meditation of some sort before you begin any creative work- for me it's incredibly helpful! This episode is aligned with the teachings of The Artist’s Way, Rick Rubin’s new book The Creative Act and Inner Work. Putting links to them because I love them so! https://amzn.to/3GcpFAg https://amzn.to/47Ly5tS https://amzn.to/3GcsEbE Support this week’s sponsor, BetterHelp: Find your bright spot this season, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/HELPMEBEME today to get 10% off your first month. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is an episode inviting you to shed one part of an old, wounded self. A chip on your shoulder that exists currently. To start to see yourself as not small, not trivial, but strong and confident. When we get into a more open, loving groove in our lives, we can grow our power. This is an episode for reorienting your energy toward that which expands: Conditioning yourself toward a target, especially as we move toward the end of the year. Together, let’s ask: how do I want to feel and what do I want to bring forth. I think of our actions and intentions as echoes that ripple outwards into our future and also into the world. So let’s begin to filter that as we move through the end of this year: what will I create in my life? What is no longer serving me? This episode has lots of tools for stepping back from feelings of less-than and also bringing out the love you already have inside.   To support this week’s sponsors check out:   Find your bright spot this season, with BetterHelp. Visit BetterHelp.com/HELPMEBEME today to get 10% off your first month.   Visit lifemd.com/HELPMEBEME today and see why LifeMD is America’s most trusted leader in virtual healthcare.   And to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is about building a mental sense of sanctuary from the outside in and the inside out. This is aimed at moving through your life in a state of trust and openness: teaching yourself out of self-limiting thought loops and responses. One thing I’ve been thinking about a lot lately is the importance of our conditions. They very much co-create our lives in that they create the factors we have bandwidth to respond to. What conditions are you being subjected to in your day-to-day life? How can we become conscious of them and begin to set higher goals in this area? All change in life begins with a goal. Once you set it we are already moving toward it. A life that is conducive to happiness and serenity and success really comes down to curating the ingredients that allow for that to happen. Often what stops that from being possible is small thinking (stopping ourselves from striving) or one negative factor like a bad relationship or an unhealthy work environment. So how can we create a life of happiness, harmony, inspiration and luxury? If you feel like you could use a cleanse or a boost in this area this one’s for you. To support this week’s sponsors check out Better Help! Make your brain your friend, with Better Help. Visit BetterHelp.com/HelpMeBeMe today to get 10% off your first month.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who is wants to confront what could be a major life change like a separation, a divorce, or perhaps letting go of an addiction. This is to enable you to do some processing in your own head – not for confronting another person. I know these are disparate types of changes, but I think they are similar processes – in that we often feel like we cannot possibly do it. We cannot possibly let go of something that has kept us safe in a routine for so long. That has helped us create a sense of control or normalcy. But if you are intrigued by this episode, I am guessing that some part of you wants to explore an answer and to be at least able to fully do that without holding yourself back/hiding. This is about letting go of FEAR as a process of willful blindness and instead taking the stigma out of thinking through all sides of a future decision. The goal: moving through hard shit with love in your heart – for others, and for yourself, and being able to welcome the truth of how you feel. This is how we ultimately create healthy boundaries and make the future new. When we hide or ignore problems, we create more drag on our life and also often make problems bigger than they have to be. Regardless, I hope this helps you get more intuned with how you feel about something in your life, whether or not the situation changes or stays exactly as its been. Sending love! To support our sponsors, check out: Brooklinen! It’s no trick–Brooklinen’s best-selling linens are sure to curb those seasonal scaries this fall.  Visit in-store or online at Brooklinen.com, and use code HELPMEBEME for $20 off your order of $100 or more. HelloFresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/50helpmebeme and use code 50helpmebeme for 50% off plus free shipping! RocketMoney! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions – and manage your money the easy way – by going to RocketMoney.com/HelpMeBeMe For more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for issues related to couples or former couples who are bound together by some means – whether that be a business, children, or a living circumstance. OR perhaps you are in a long-term relationship that is no longer healthy or loving that you are choosing to remain in, for a particular reason. This is for navigating from an empowered and compassionate position, negotiating voicing your needs when they might conflict with the needs or wishes of the other. This is for getting to the truth of the experience – seeing what needs boundary work, and also what is outside of your control. A lot of our pain comes from resisting something that simply needs processing/to move through our body. The goal of this episode is to give you a change of perspective so you can act from a place of agency and honesty. Sending love, friends. Take heart…Life is long and complicated, it has many seasons – things will continue to change, so leave room for that. If you like this work, please support our sponsors! Take the drama out of planning an outfit and upgrade your closet with Quince today! Go to Quince.com/helpmebeme for free shipping on your order and 365-day returns.   Subscribe to Earth Breeze and save 40%! Go to EarthBreeze.com/helpmebeme Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Relationships are very difficult because we get lost in them: they can overtake our sense of self, especially if that relationship is long term and we don’t have a lot of contact with others outside of the relationship. This is a reminder to come back into your own shoes – if we tip off balance we start to default to what someone else wants or what we think they want us to do. To the other person, this can also feel like we don’t respect ourselves. I use this metaphor often for relationships but they’re like a rubber band is around both people and we have to keep it taught by walking together, but separately. There should be equal and voluntary gift giving/taking, and if that balance has been tipped and things are growing lopsided, the most important thing you need to do is register and react to that truth. This episode has tools for getting back in touch with your sense of self and also tools for setting healthy boundaries, if you are in a situation where the other person is encouraging the enmeshment. Support this weeks sponsors! Brooklinen.com – promo code HELPMEBEME Experience the difference for yourself, and check out Brooklinen’s new fall collection! Visit in-store or online at Brooklinen.com, and use code HELPMEBEME for $20 off your online order of $100 or more. RocketMoney.com/HelpMeBeMe Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills—all in one place. Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions – and manage your money the easy way – by going to RocketMoney.com/HelpMeBeMe HelloFresh.com/50HelpMeBeMe Hello Fresh is America’s number one meal kit! Go to HelloFresh.com/50HelpMeBeMe and use code 50helpmebeme for 50% off plus 15% off the next 2 months! For more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How we relate to our life and what it contains is always being renegotiated and that is positive and healthy. Sometimes our priorities change or our needs change. Or areas of friction are notifying us that we are ready to change. This episode is about course correcting: looking at areas of feedback or friction in your own life – and also those that arise in relationships. It’s for taking an inventory of any negative trends that perhaps aren’t serving you. Course correction is really another term for intentionality. This is for reorienting your path toward what you want, including things like autonomy and balance. This is related to your relationship with your life, and your relationship with others – so I have some tools around codependency. This is inspired by several letters I’ve gotten where people say they have a problem, that they are a certain way and they end up with a certain result, and how that can feel defeating. And I wanted to address that by saying this is the beginning of change! It’s an invitation. Life is forever a process, which is the fun of it. Place this frame around all work you may be doing: this feedback is helping us get where we want to go. There is no such thing as “this is the way I am” because we are always in motion. Sending love and to see any more of my work or make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you are a caregiver type or your relationship is somewhat uneven, this is an episode aimed at looking inward. It’s for seeing your role in how the imbalance is created. TBC, this is about becoming aware. Not making big moves or changes. Just simple curiosity and awareness. This is an episode that is going to challenge you! There’s this totally unconscious thing that happens as you are revealed next to someone. We start to feel vulnerable and with that, we seek control. This is when we start to do more and give more as a means of feeling more secure. It’s to abate feelings of “less-than.” If you are someone who gets too wrapped up in the thoughts or feelings of others then I think this episode will resonate with you. This also extends to feeling like you need others to act a certain way, or feeling like you are doing it all and the other person in your relationship is not doing enough. In other words, getting stuck in a caregiver role or a role where you are the one who is overactive, and they are the one who is under-active.  What it really comes down to is not being able to accept the truth of someone as they are. In that denial there is some overcompensation that occurs which leads to feeling really angry at them for not being the way you want them to be. So that’s where this episode is focused! For more of my work or to make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com   To support this week’s sponsors check out:  Quince! Lovely minimalist fashion without the designer pricetag. Upgrade your closet this summer with Quince. Go to Quince.com/helpmebeme to get free shipping and 365-day returns on your next order.   Meet Earth Breeze! My new favorite detergent. Better for the planet, and SO much easier to use. Right now, my listeners can subscribe to Earth Breeze and save 40%! Go to EarthBreeze.com/HelpMeBeMe   Rocket Money! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions – and manage your money the easy way – by going to RocketMoney.com/helpmebeme   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This podcast is a reminder to come back to the best of you–the best thoughts, the best energy, the best focus. It’s somewhat a reflection episode: a time to get right with yourself and get tuned. There is nothing wrong or lessor about the life you have chosen – it is important to know and embrace that self. To see your decisions as founded on the past you have lived.   Make your life, your mission and your focus about what is meaningful to you. Do not make it a reaction to others. Know where you stand and where you’re going. Welcome that feedback around what isn’t working, and what is. This will set us free from false missions.   This episode is also to tune your energy if you have gotten into a groove of feeling less-than/exhausted/a victim. Or simply less than grateful. The tools in this episode will also remind you of how to jump what I would call energetic channels. It’s super easy to fall into a groove of feeling a particular way, day after day. To forget glee and optimism. It becomes an addiction of sorts–stress, depression and anger feed themselves. But we can remember how to feel another way and resume that feeling of excitement and gratitude. Ready to welcome something new and great.    Support this week’s sponsor! Hello Fresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/helpmebeme50 and use code helpmebeme50 for 50% off plus free shipping!   To check out a book by Dr. Joe Dispenza, you can click here. And to check out the art and work of my friend who passed away check here. Sending my love to all of you out there! Looking for more? Visit me at YayWithMe.com   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is a motivation-based episode for creative individuals. What is that thing you really, genuinely want but some part of you is halfway trying to let it slip away? It’s that weird thing we do – we decide to forget. It’s related to subconscious fears but also an energy-saving setting that we tend to fall into because we are quite literally exhausted and distracted by external alerts, haptics, notifications and bright interface lights. We basically live with slot machines in our hands. The mental tank is tapped by regular, everyday functioning so the glucose is short. To really start to change our habits in favor of what we deeply want, sometimes we steer our lives by watching our feet walk in a new direction, despite our brain. This is all about what I’m calling The Two You’s – the dreamer and the worrier, and how we can really look at ourselves from outside ourselves in order to make the right decisions and investments in life. Because a lot of what guides us is a sense of habit. Here are the links I mentioned, the first being Adam Grant’s Ted podcast called Rethinking (former sponsor of the show). And the fiction book I am enjoying called “Waiting for the Barbarians.” And last the Rick Rubin interview with Trent Reznor which speaks to showmanship. And lastly, to support my work and make a donation head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you feel you’re out of time, that there are not enough resources, or that you have to overdeliver because you are not keeping up? This is for anyone who is pervasively focusing on what they need and lack over what they have and what is bountiful.   This is an episode about ways to be more conscious, SLOW DOWN, and really deliberately move your body and mind and energy into a state of trust. Trust in self. Trust in time. Trust in the universe and in your safety. Maybe everything is just fine and perfect, as it is now.   A lack/scarcity mentality is something we may have developed at a young age that we can’t stop flexing as adults. Like a hamster gathering seeds from our food bowl and hoarding in a corner. This is a bad habit and a perspective that is self-inflicted, so the good news is we can teach ourselves out of it.   This episode is dedicated to Little Richard, graffiti artist known by the name of XPRES. My first crush. Always true to himself. He recently passed away, very unexpectedly. This was already and episode I was writing but his death definitely brought this into sharper focus.   Sending love to all of you. If you want to make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Everything we live is either a bad habit or a good habit. What are you rehearsing feeling? This is for remembering a sense of limitlessness, and by that I mean the perspective of openness and optimism. We all have days like that – when we can see “wow, anything is possible and I am capable of anything!” When we feel our best, most confident and we feel strongly that the universe is on our side. Yet we can also fall into grooves of feeling small, limited and put upon. But the good news is we can jump out of that energy by reminding ourselves that the former exists. It’s a memory of reality that we can resume. So my hope with this episode is that you wilk really remember how that feels – to live in an awareness of your own limitlessness.   For more of my work and to make a donation head to Yay With Me! xo   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is about codependency and how it can make it hard to choose right. This is aimed at changing the goal you have in your search for love. This is for anyone who has a habit of choosing bad relationships and therefore they feel like they cannot be happy. Maybe you have a pattern of super meh relationships and you don’t really know if you like the other person, or maybe you have a pattern of really legit terrible relationships where you are chosen by that other person and they adore you, but you find again and again they are a mess and your job is to clean them up and beg for tiny crumbs of getting your needs met.   A lot of the time when we grow up with dysfunction and chaos, we find that we are unable to judge the other people we meet because we don’t have a connection to our inner compass. And we are struggling to feel safe, so we constantly focus on the others around us. As we get older we are still in this state of reacting to everything around ourselves. And as a way to get relief from our anxiety, we help and soothe others. We build them up, fix them and make them our project. When someone sees beauty and greatness in us and we share a connection, the pain goes away and we fall deeply in love. But this is a love that depletes us – we are constantly trying to come back to that feeling of intoxication: the moment when we were seen, loved unconditionally, and the other person made all the pain go away. But instead, we find that we are still working and working for crumbs.   If this sounds like you – and perhaps you are aware of it, and sick of it, and thinking you cannot ever find love, know that that thinking is not helpful or functional.  And it’s not true. It’s just where you are right now, but that can change. You have to actively want to change that – to see the issue at the root and work on it from there. This one’s for Aubrey.   To support this week’s sponsors head to Life MD !   LifeMD.com/HelpMeBeMe LifeMD is the simplest way to get the healthcare you need, where and when you need it. Become a LifeMD member today for on-demand video visits with a doctor, unlimited messaging with your LifeMD care team, and so much more. Membership plans start at a little more than a dollar a day, so don’t wait. Visit lifemd.com/HelpMeBeMe to get started, and experience the difference of virtual healthcare.   To make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is about growing comfortable asking for what you want, and also comfortable when someone else does not give that to you. Really stepping back in that moment and accepting that at face value. Not taking another person personally and also not getting pulled into inner narratives around their response can result in a total night and day outcome in how you experience your life. This is also about setting healthy boundaries in relationships specifically in how you demand good treatment for yourself. I would say this episode may resonate more with those who consider themselves recovering codependents, like myself. Standing up for yourself and your needs is an important habit to keep, so you can keep yourself and your relationship safe. I don’t mean that everything has to be a fight– this is not about focusing on the bad things over the good things. This is really about taking the stigma out of bringing up how you’d like to be loved and cared for so you can continue to be healthy in your relationship. Many issues that come up in our intimate relationships are co-created by the fears and unmet needs of our past. This episode will also give you some awareness around taking in the other person’s response, so you don’t take it personally if/when they respond badly to voicing personal issues. Because often half of what another person perceives is their projection of their own past unmet needs.   Support our sponsors this week! Check out RocketLanguages.com   Sign up for a free trial today and discover the joy of speaking Spanish, French, Italian, German, Japanese, Chinese, and many more languages like a local. Use the promo code HELPMEBEME to get up to $200 off on any language. Visit rocketlanguages.com to get started today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is an episode all about tuning into your authentic self, the practice of play and having fun for the sake of strengthening your creative muscles.   You can curate an inner state that allows you to tap into your creativity, intuition and joyful presence so you can channel your authentic creative voice. This is a reservoir that exists at all times, and you can draw upon it if you exercise these muscles and make it a consistent practice. This is also about creating an inner hierarchy in that it enhances the way you look at the world and everything in it.   We create the world and future we want to see. What are you inviting? And follow-up question, is it hindered by unconscious fear and resistance? SO much of what stops us from success in areas we want to pursue are unseen blocks. Old fears that we think don’t mean much to us but in our behaviors they do.   We very much want the average of our life to be made up of things that are excellent and inspiring. When all that we take in is creative, inspiring, and artful, this becomes the platform from which we launch. It’s our “raw material.”   We create a world for ourselves with not only what we choose to focus on, but also the energy and perspective we curate, the people we surround ourselves with, the content we ingest, and the level we hold ourselves to in our personal bar. Never forget that you can boost that world and make it reflective of all that you love.   This is dedicated to Rick Rubin - we are preaching a lot of the same messages. Love your new book and I recommend it to everyone! To get the amazing book by Rick Rubin: The Creative Act To support this week’s sponsors: Native Sunscreen Give your skin the protection it deserves with Native’s mineral Sunscreens! Go to NativeDeo.com/HelpMe, or use promo code helpme at checkout, to get 20% off your first order! LifeMD LifeMD is the simplest way to get the healthcare you need, where and when you need it. Become a LifeMD member today for on-demand video visits with a doctor, unlimited messaging with your LifeMD care team, and so much more. Membership plans start at a little more than a dollar a day, so don’t wait. Visit to get started, and experience the difference of virtual healthcare. LifeMD.com/HelpMeBeMe   For more of my work and to make a donation head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What is the most important ingredient for living a happy life? Knowing what you want. This is an episode aimed at giving you awareness and intention: making the space to be able to tell how you feel while you live your life. This is for burnout. Exhaustion. And not being sure you’re happy with where you are and what you’re doing. Know that the little maneuvers go a long way: changing how you invest 5 minutes here and there can alter how you feel about your entire life. Once we have an awareness of what we value, space opens up for those things to flower with simple honesty and intention. To support this week’s sponsors please check out: Songfinch.com The cost for a personalized song is $199, and let me tell you it is worth every penny! Songfinch has given us an exclusive code for $20 off your custom song. You can use code HELPMEBEME and get $20 off a custom song! But hurry, you have to use it before May 14th, Mother’s Day!   Headspace.com/HelpMeBeMe Headspace has helped me and more than 100 million people worldwide. They can help you too! For a limited time, all of you can try Headspace FREE for 30 days by going to Headspace.com/HelpMeBeMe   iHerb.com/HelpMeBeMe Get 22% off @iherb with promo code HELPMEBEME at iherb.com/HELPMEBEME I shop here for all my probiotics and vitamin supplements !   RocketLanguages.com Sign up for a free trial today and discover the joy of speaking Spanish, French, Italian, German, Japanese, Chinese, Korean and many more languages like a local. Use the promo code HELPMEBEME to get up to $200 off on any language. Visit rocketlanguages.com to get started today!   And to see more of my work or make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Remember that everyone feels a sense of self-doubt and that can actually be a sign you’re pushing yourself to grow. We can help ourselves to curate an inner reservoir of “I got this” by using thought-hacks and mental work-arounds. This is how we choose to widen or our locus of control: it’s a subtle shift toward feeling we are riding the wave versus being pummeled by it. It’s all about mentally moving ourselves to the top of the wave that is life and fear. My goal is for you to leave this episode with an increased sense of risk tolerance and have a few work arounds in the moments you suffer from a feeling of lack/imposter syndrome. Never forget – some of the most outwardly successful people in the world are utterly miserable. Happiness and self-love are things we curate from the inside and they emanate outwards. They’re not created from outside conditions. It all starts with a choice – to make the inside be the truest metric of success. I invite you to ask yourself – “How do I want to feel?” Inspired. Confident. Self-loving. Self-forgiving. I want to be always okay, no matter what anyone else says, and no matter what I have “won” in my life. I am enough as I am. Sending so much love friends. And to support this week’s sponsor, please check out Native Sunscreen! Give your skin the protection it deserves with Native’s mineral Sunscreens! Go to www.NativeDeo.com/HelpMeBeMe or use promo code helpmebeme at checkout, to get twenty 20% off your first order.   For more of my work you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The energy inside creates what you see outside. What are you putting out to the world with your energy? That’s coming right back into you, creating your life experience. Something I’ve been doing lately to really self-examine and rise about my own smallness, is what I’ll call turning inward. When I hate on something or criticize a person in my mind, I do a turnaround: I look at that reaction and examine it like it is targeted at myself, so I can feel what I am creating. If you find yourself being critical, it’s usually coming from fear and judgement in you that is hurtful all-around. The reason to do this process of turning things inward is everyone wins! You win: your life and happiness benefit but also the world wins. Not to mention, it creates a totally different world via your perception. This is an episode for anyone who wants to grow in the direction of more whole, less needy and less insecure. Growth is a great project to have, and one that is lifelong. It’s something we can do incrementally – with super tiny but deliberate thought-hacks. Regardless, make sure you’re always giving yourself mental space to focus for yourself for growth. In your capacity, in your compassion, in your maturity. Sending love to all of you and if you’d like to support our sponsor this week while becoming a better person, check out Headspace! Headspace has helped me and more than 100 million people worldwide. They can help you too! For a limited time, all of you can try Headspace free for 30 days by going to Headspace.com/HelpMeBeMe You won’t find this offer anywhere else! This is not something they normally do. Check out Headspace.com/HelpMeBeMe The Byron Katie book I mentioned in this episode can be found here: https://amzn.to/3FXc53G  And to find more of my work or make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is an episode that creates a very gentle initiation of a change in your life. A change of lifestyle, a change of perspective, a change of overall bar, and ultimately a change of epic and wonderful proportions. It’s all about getting on the level with yourself and then getting all the ducks in a row. I look at this as the first stage of building momentum toward something big and great like a paradigm shift.   This is about getting literal about something you want to change: really visualizing it while also letting go of the energy of struggle. Struggles that result from fear or the struggles that result from impatience and muscling toward a goal.   This is aimed at allowing you to set (a seemingly) lofty goal and then “getting right with yourself.” By that I mean really looking at where you are and what needs to be done.   When you can state an intention from a place of truth and full transparency, everything aligns. The key in this is really meaning and letting go of how it will happen or if it will happen. Just saying “I choose this.” It starts with that. What will you choose?    Support our sponsors and check out: JenniKayne.com When it comes to investing in an outfit that’ll last, we choose Jenni Kayne. For a limited time our listeners get 15% off their entire order. Go to jennikayne.com and use the code HELPMEBEME to get 15% off. NativeDeo.com Get twenty percent off your first order by going to NativeDEO.com/helpme or use promo code HELPME at checkout for 20% off your first order. Here’s the quit smoking book "Alan Carr’s Easy Way" – if you’re addicted to something, read it or any of the other Alan Carr editions. If you already read it and didn't quit, read it again! I had to read it a few times. https://amzn.to/3TvFsjv   And here are the episodes I mentioned on boundary setting: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/help-me-be-me/id895918183?i=1000535368733 https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/help-me-be-me/id895918183?i=1000532339844     And here’s a great book all about staying curious and pursuing your own excellence – I can’t stop recommending it!! It’s “The Artist’s Way.” https://amzn.to/3FkuaIM   For more of my work or to make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Never forget that change is possible and at any point in time. This is an episode for anyone who is feeling a bit stagnant or perhaps uninspired, so-so, bored, or stuck. I think sometimes when we get depressed we don’t even notice. Because in your conscious mind, you can easily distract and get into your phone, the limitless options on streaming, or busy yourself with work. If you’re unsure, you can look to your behavior as a way to discern whether or not you are happy and thriving. Are you not interested in doing much? Are you neutral on many things? Do you feel like a blank piece of paper? If you are happy and thriving, you will feel your aliveness: you feel energized and ready to go when you wake up. It’s like a feeling of excitement for life. If you’d like to get more of that, this is an episode for you. With this episode, I really wanted to paint the picture of how change can happen. It can happen today. It doesn’t need to be hard, but when we get into grooves of feeling hopeless we think that it’s too hard. We start to focus on the wrong things – suddenly we are looking down at our feet saying, “I don’t like where they’re standing.” This kind of thinking is just wasted energy. Look at where you want to go. Let’s tune the engine! To support of sponsor this week, please checkout and download Headspace! The best meditation app ever! You can go to www.headspace.com/helpmebeme to get Headspace free for 30 days! For more of my work and to make a donation you can go to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Roles! What do I mean by that: I mean unspoken hierarchies, relational patterns, engrained and felt archetypes that our family, friends and coworkers reinforce and we reinforce in how we interact with them. This episode is a bit meta. What do I mean by that? It looks at implied and non-verbal communication that creates a lot of the feelings and manifestations in your person via your relationships. So much of communication is non-verbal and implied with tone, delivery, physical cues, subtext, or plays off contextual meaning. We are reading our “place” in a particular situation at the same time as we are dictating our place by how we set boundaries, what we tolerate and how we react to others. This episode is not about dissecting how those situations occur – it’s more a reflection exercise for you to examine the role you have taken on in any given relationship and consider whether or not you want to shift it. We control so much with how we choose to dance in a set of given rhythms. So this is an invitation to examine the relationships in which you play a role that is not bringing out your best, most joyful and positive self. Maybe it’s in your family of origin. Maybe it’s at work with your coworkers. Maybe it’s in your new family unit. Or a friend group. Regardless we can change everything just with how we covet and respect ourselves! To read more about how family systems work/manifest, you can check out these books: https://amzn.to/3IlYDYW https://amzn.to/3lD7igt For more about setting boundaries you can check out https://amzn.to/40NADoG For some studies around eating disorders and the interactivity of family dynamics you can check out https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5633277/ https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2016.02046/full https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/when-food-is-family/201204/issues-in-attachment-may-contribute-eating-disorders For more of my work and to make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Becoming the expert on you. There’s an optimal range of functioning that we want to stay within in order to enjoy our lives and bring all of our selves “into the room.” When we get tipped in the direction of feeling too hurried or too sluggish, that is something that we can learn to recognize and then regulate– just like that dial that turns the heat up or down in your home. Why? Because the truth is – everything can be simple and your body can remain calm. No matter the situation, it will happen one minute at a time. We are only in the moment we are living right now and to approach that from a place of serenity will allow us to honor our truth at any given time. I hope you enjoy this and for more of my work you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who struggles with thoughts that are self-critical and deactivating. Our goal with this episode is beginning to teach ourselves to not attach or engage with the thoughts that aren’t serving us, and more importantly – stopping ourselves in the process of scripting out narratives that create negative future outcomes. This is really about practicing non-reactivity and non-judgment in the face of thoughts or feelings. And to do that we have to recognize when it’s happening to us and rehearse a new process. We can retrain our brain and reset the grooves that have set in. A lot of the pain we experience in life is the pain we tell ourselves to feel - including when it comes to feeling bad about ourselves. This was a request – I hope it helps and sending much love! For more of my work and to make a donation you can head to YayWithMe.com xo! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Let’s start this year by reminding ourselves that we can have so much joy and fun and vibrance. And let’s also take stock of the things we love, and also the things we want to work on with a bit of focused energy. In Tibetan the word Karma translates to action – seed – results. With this idea of planting seeds that eventually bloom into results, I wanted to invite you to reflect on your year past and scan areas for possible growth. The goal of this episode is to journal and reflect so we can be more intentional, conscious and compassionate as we bring about the year to come. What will you grow with your actions? I invite you to grow more inspiration, love, intimacy, and health and success in your life.   For more of my work and to make a donation, you can head to YayWithMe.com   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I would love to introduce "Sorta Awesome" a women's lifestyle podcast geared towards listeners who want to stay current on all things awesome, including culture, media and trending conversations! Each episode of Sorta Awesome begins with the Awesome of the Week. Meg and her co-host share a recent discovery that makes life easier, better or more sparkly. From there, the show delves into topics that are as varied as the team itself! Sorta Awesome on Apple Podcasts- apple.co/sorta Sorta Awesome on Spotify Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who obsesses about the thoughts and feelings of others, clinging, feeling anxious and being unable to be yourself. This is targeted at those who are in bad relationship loops but it will also help if this is something that comes up in familial relationships. I thought it was a good refresher for the holidays because a lot of stuff comes up this time of year.   This habit has a lot to do with codependency and relationship reliance because it’s a need to get validation from another person – to hear specific words from them that you are not hearing. It’s also something that comes about when we have a habit of controlling others, often due to fear and uncertainty during childhood. Regardless what we can do to help ourselves is recognize this is happening and come back into ourselves.   That is the key: working on us for us, holding our own hand as we move through the pain. So here are some tools to come back to yourself and ground so you can come back to reality.   For more of my work and to make a donation, head to YayWithMe.com xo   To get your StoryWorth subscription for your loved ones this year, head to Storyworth.com/helpmebeme   To get your Nutrafol head to Nutrafol.com and use promocode HELPMEBEME   Happy Holidays friends! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Life is temporary – and that is kind of a beautiful thing. I recall as a child thinking that was so intensely and overwhelmingly sad. I almost couldn’t comprehend it. And now I can and I see it as a beautiful part of this experience.   I think a lot of people don’t think about that part of life because it’s too far off or too painful to think about, and because of that we don’t curate our experiences in the way we might if it was more top of mind. Meaning we spend a lot of time in the doing. The pursuing. The distractions. The stuff that doesn’t matter. Often it takes a loss to see how short and temporary life is and how quickly it goes by, to put things in perspective.   So as you move through this life experience, what can we do? We can first become aware. Make it a goal – an intention– to appreciate, value, slow down, be present. Enjoy. And we can be thoughtful in the experiences we curate and the time we invest.   The goal of this episode is to allow yourself the opportunity to take stock of your priorities and the relationships that have great meaning in your life. Maybe that means changing your relationship to a parent or elder for the better. Maybe it means investing your time differently. Or simply appreciating those in your life a bit more.   I’d like this to be a happy and positive episode. Not a downer. Hopefully this allows you to reflect and re-enter an old relationship, anew.   This has been a request quite a few times and it’s also something I have been thinking a lot about. Aging parents, losing loved ones recently. I hope you enjoy it and so so sorry for the background noise! I had to record outside because of sick kids at home.   For more of my work and to make a donation, you can head to YayWithMe.com xo   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tools and insights for those who have dreams but are unable to take action toward them. This is about how to work with fear of success and fear in general. And most importantly looking at what is holding you back. Because when we don’t act the goal isn’t to force ourselves to act when we’re not ready. (Like, this is not about being pro-impulse. Because often there are real factors in our ambivalence.) The goal is to begin to understand why you are not acting so you can take the right steps.   This is for anyone who has an inkling that they’d like to do something and they cannot for the life of them get themselves to even try. It might be a job. It might be as simple as making a TikTok. (That’s my weird fear.) Or maybe you are absolutely SURE that something is meant for you, like you are mid-screenplay – but you watch yourself repeatedly be inactive on this front. Or you don’t even know where to start – and so you don’t.   Maybe it’s not even that explicit – maybe it’s just a general sense of procrastination. Or something weirder – like a general sense of resent or distaste for those who are successful at something in particular. That is because you are a magnet for this thing: you are reacting to it because it exists inside you! So use that feedback and take a listen.   This is life school, remember? We are here to grow. Let’s give this little seed some water. Small changes evoke massive, life-changing ones!   Here are the two links I mention: Dr. Stutz’s website with more of his tools plus more about the Netflix doc “Stutz” that I mention: https://www.thetoolsbook.com/   And the book, “The Artist’s Way” that I love: https://amzn.to/3OvUrHr   For more of my work and to make a donation, you can head to https://www.YayWithMe.com and to check out my very first TikTok’s (gulp) you can find me at https://www.tiktok.com/@yaywithme   Xo!   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This is for anyone who has a relationship with someone or has to have interaction with someone who does not respect their right to basic human kindness, respect, personal space, or maintain healthy boundaries. This might show up as a person who insults you. Who picks at you, mocks you, targets you by belittling you. Maybe they make you are crazy for the way you do something. For the words you choose. For some habit you keep. For the way you exist or some random thing. Whatever it is, it’s confusing and hurtful. It also might make you start to question whether or not you are crazy. That my friends is the definition of gaslighting. And it may happen to you in a casual circumstance in your life. It can happen in any intimate relationship and it can happen in any environment, and don’t worry– you’re not crazy. The other name for this is ‘The war on words’ – that’s my term for someone starting to spin you in a web of conflict. So as soon as you try and pin them down, they jump to the next topic or the next one. And you can’t seem to solve the conflict – it only seems to get bigger. If this rings any bells, I want to acknowledge that confronting a person who is angry and violent can be extremely dangerous – so if that is true for you please speak with someone at this resource and form a plan: https://www.thehotline.org/ For the rest of the links I mention in this episode, here’s the one about escaping a relationship with a narcissist: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-50-how-to-break-away-from-a-narcissist-relationship/id895918183?i=1000341326142 Here’s one link to Gabor Maté’s site about the connection between anger suppression and disease (he has a lot of great books, though a lot of them are downers haha): https://drgabormate.com/healing-force-within/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices